


They just fit

by Outerspaceduncegirl



Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Christmas Eve, F/M, Hugs, this is very fluffy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-26
Updated: 2015-12-26
Packaged: 2018-05-09 12:18:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,434
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5539709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Outerspaceduncegirl/pseuds/Outerspaceduncegirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He is standing here in the cold. In a suit, mind you. Always that damn suit. He looks so disheveled and tired, half-panting, and staring at her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	They just fit

**Author's Note:**

> I make them hug a lot. Because honestly, that's all I ever wanted to see in the serie. A hug between Ellie and Alec. Exept that's exactly what they won't give ... Oh well...  
> So here you go. They hug.

He is standing here in the cold. In a suit, mind you. Always that damn suit. He looks so disheveled and tired, half-panting, and staring at her.

 

 

Ellie Miller was in her living room with her two sons, enjoying the first Christmas since the trial. The Christmas tree was troning in the center of the room, and wee Fred was happily running around it, letting out some shriek of laughter when he brushed a branch in his mad run.

Ellie had her heart half torn. It was strange, this Christmas. This Family. No father. She shivered at the thought that it was in those moments she actually started missing him. Not Joe himself. But the presence of a husband.

Tom was walking back an forth between the kitchen and the living room, watching with care the baking of the chocolate cake he'd made for desert. Christmas carols were playing in the background.

And Ellie was smiling broadly at Fred exciting new game when the doorbell rang.

She opened the door without any expectation, and he was there.

 

 

He is still there, waiting on her treshold, not pronouncing a word, and she almost wants to yell at him. It's the first time she's seen him since the trial and the closure of the Sandbrook case. Since then, no phone calls, nothing. Not a trace of the man she'd once considered as her only friend. She might still do, but six mouths of silence in the face quite cooled her down.

  
"Hi." he has the guts to say.

He waits, as he usually does, for an answer, estimating his part of the job done here.

Her nostrils flare and he should see something coming. But Alec Hardy is oblivious.

She lets him in only because it's bloody freezing outside and she doesn't want her heating bill to be any higher than it already is. At least that's what she tells herself.  
Alec sniffs and looks around him, taking in the new decoration of the house he's once seen inhabited by a murderer. Then his eyes drift back towards Ellie and study her face.

"How are you ?" his strong scottish accent emphasize the trouble he has to actually ask this question. He forces himself. He knows he has something to feel guilty about.  
Ellie's blood bolts in her veins and her fist clenches.

"How am I ?" she wispers through clenched teeth. She can't believe the nerve of this man. _Six months. Six months_ , is resounding in her head. "Well, time to come round and check that isn't it ?"

Alec frowns, and then, as if he only realises his mistake, blushes and looks down. A mumble comes from behind his beard.

"Sorry ?" Ellie bents her head forward with raised eyebrows.

"Haven't had the time. Been busy." he repeats a bit more clearly.

Ellie's lips twich in a bitter smirk. "Yeah. Right. Should've known better." And as he doesn't say anything she continues, "Foolish me who thought I was your friend."

His eyes jerk back to hers. "You are." he says strongly with brows furrowed.

"Well you could make it a bit clearer then !" she exclaims in anger. "For god's sake !" And she opens her front door and disappears into the night, slamming it behind her.

Alec is dumbstruck. He watches the piece of wood with shock, mouth half opened, and tries to register what has just happened. He came back. He came back for her and ... A door in his face- Was it really what he deserved ?

From the very back of his mind comes the echo of the answer. And as he tries to push it away, it gets stronger. Yes. He has deserved this.

Slowly, his eyelids close and he lets out a long sigh. One of his hands comes to his face and he pinches the bridge of his nose. Among all of the guilt already gathered along the years is added the sharp pain of a new one. The guilt of letting Ellie down. And somehow, he had never thought her resentment would matter this much. Now he knows what he has to do : mend.

 

She's in the middle of the street, in nothing more than a jumper, arms crossed, breathing slow, although Alec knows a volcano is brooding inside her. He comes from behind her, so she doesn't see him.

"Ellie." he calls softly.

"Don't call me Ellie." she spits.

He bites his tongue and moves in front of her. "Miller." he says with strength.

She doesn't look at him. She's staring at the ground, her arms protectively crossed on her chest, and he can see, he can _feel_ , that she's hurt.

Somehow he knows her so well. Yet they have only met a year or so ago, and he was gone half of the time. But when he sees her closing on herself, and letting out bursts of anger, he rightfully knows it's because her heart, if not broken, is torn.

"Miller." he repeats.

Her chin starts to tremble and he can see tears gathering in her eyes.

"I'm sorry." he whispers. And the apologie costs him a lot. He doesn't know how to apologies. But she deserves it.

"You're a selfish wanker." she says, but her voice is already weaker.

"I know."

"I was expecting something from you. When you said you left I thought ... I never thought that you would be stupid enough not to call !" her voice starts to crack. "I thought you knew that I ... _cared_."

Alec closes his eyes as a strange warmth flows through his blood. "I ... I'm sorry." That's all what he can say.

"Well damn right you are." Now hot tears are running down her cheeks. "Because you're the blindest person I've ever meet, in my whole life ..." she trails off, and now anger is almost gone, sobs replacing the fire.

Alec shakes his head and takes a step back, looking at the sky in surch of words. "I thought that ... I thought you, and your boys, were better off without me." he has found his voice back, and now it is his heart that is pouring. "I was just a reminder." His accent is thick. "I was like a walking memory of all that you went through, and all of that pain, and shit that this year has brought."

He looks intently at Ellie but she can't bring herself to look him in the eyes. "I had to go away, you needed space."

"Bullshit !" , she snaps, and she is looking right at him. "That's complete bullshit." Her eyes are red, and her face, lit by the street lamp, can let him guess how tired she is. "I didn't need _space_." she says the word with disgust. "I needed _someone_. And this someone, you dumbo, was you." She point at his chest with her shaking finger. "I. Needed. You.", she taps on his tie with each word. When she is finished, she feels empty.

Alec is speechless. All the fervour he had got back vanished in three words, and he just feels ... lost. He got it wrong. All along, he got it wrong. He never understood what she really wanted. ' _Needed_.'

And he seems to do that a lot. Misunderstanding people's feeling. But he tries. He tries so hard to get it right.

"Okay." he lets out. His arms aimlessly hang on his sides.

"Right." Ellie nods, and tightens her arms around her.

He waits, and silence falls. What does he have to do now ? He tilts his head on the side and hesitates. "Do you ..."

She raises eyebrows.

"Do you ... " his voice fade out. He can't finish that sentence. God dammit he doesn't know what to do.

Ellie shakes impatiently her head. "Do I ... what ? Have you lost your voi-" She stops in mid-sentence because Alec Hardy, has made a step forward and taken her in his arms. And hugs her.

Well it is a sort of a hug, because she still has her arms on her chest, and because he definitely is uncomfortable and unaccustomed to do that.

Now it's her turn to be speechless.

"Accept it for heaven's sake." Alec mumbles somewhere above her head. He can feel how tensed she is, from head to toes.

Alec being taller than her, his soulder hides her view and her nose is burried in the material of his suit. He smells of soap. Cheap soap. Hotel soap. She closes her eyes. Just like the soap they used to have on holidays when she was little. There is also another smell, more of Alec himself. Something she can't quite define, but that she certainly recognizes.

She relaxes a bit and leans in his soulder, taking in his smell. Because unexpectedly, it doesn't remind her of anything bad. Neither the case. Nor the beach with Danny's body. Nor the trial. But it reminds her of the stolen moments of peace she had during this harsh time. Chips eaten on a bench next to the see. Late work, surrounded by files in his blue shack. Walks on the cliffs with wee Fred in his buggy. The funfair, behind his house.

She inhales, and it calms her down. She can feel it all settle inside her heart. The feelings getting organized. And peace spreading in her mind.

Without thinking much of it, she slips her arms in his back and returns the hug. Alec carefully holds her. Like he can't quite believe it. Like he expected her to jerk away, call him a wanker, and get back inside her house. But he can feel her arms firmly circling his waist, and her weight against his chest. And he is glad. He is glad that for once, she accepts his help. Although he knows this is more than help. It goes from much deeper in his heart. But better not think too much about it.

He wonders since when she hasn't hugged anyone, because he can feel the despair through her graps. When is the last time someone genuinely comforted her ?

Alec wonders, how he went from the boss she couldn't stand, to the person who has become a necessity to live. He strokes her back gently, and leans his cheek on her head. Her hair is so soft.

Unexpectedly, she feels right in his arms. Not amazing. Not brilliant. Just right. Like if it wasn't the first time he had held her. She just fits in his chest, he realises. She is the right height, the right size, the right ... everything. They are like two pieces of the same thing that completely interlock. And Alec doesn't think he wants to ever let go. And the moment goes forever.

Ellie gradually steps back of the embrace when it starts feeling really too weird, but she does so reluctantly. Their chests part, their arms come back to their sides, and internally, they both immediately miss the feeling of each other. And inwardly slap themselves for it, because one shouldn't say that about their former co-workers.

Ellie realises it is really cold in that winter night without Alec warmth around her, and remembers that she actually has a house, two boys and a Christmas dinner awaiting behind her. She looks at the tired man in front of her. Always so tired.

"Thanks." she mutters, and he nods. "Where do you spend Christmas ?" she then asks, because she already knows the answer.

"Erm ... Just gonna have a drink in a nearby bar I suppose." he shrugs.

"Nah." she has a tiny smile playing on her lips.

"No ?"

"You're coming home to spend Christmas with us." she affirms. All of a sudden, he is very embarrassed, and she knows it's just because he is an idiot, afraid of social events. So she adds :"It's only me and the boys."

That seems to reassure him. "Won't Tom mind ?" he still asks, because he cares.

"Nah." she shakes her head, hoping that it is actually the case. "Come on then. Back inside. I'm freezing my arse off, 'cause of you." And she takes the lead, not having the time to see Alec smile for himself.

Back in the hall, he points at the walls. "I like your new decoration."

"Shut up." she says and goes in her living room. "Tom,", Hardy can hear from the hall, "do you remember DI Alec Hardy ?"

Fred's happily babble fills the silence that follows. Tom must answer something because next thing Ellie is saying :"Because he's gonna spend Christmas dinner with us."

"What ?!"

"Tom !" Ellie is whispering, "He is alone, he is my friend, and none of my friend gets to spend Christmas alone. Ever."

"But-"

"And you don't get to say a _word_ of it. Now behave." Alec winces. He really doesn't like imposing himself. And he understands that Tom wouldn't want to see him, let alone on Christmas day. He is the one who arrested his dad after all. He must probably hate him.

Alec looks at the front door, and considers. Maybe if he leaves now, he can avoid ruining their Christmas. He could still get back to his hotel bedroom. And drink one or two beers in a nice place. But before he can even move, she calls.

"Hardy, coming or not coming ?"

He sighs and braces himself. "Yeah." he calls back. "'M here." he says entering the room. His eyes discover the main room and he takes in the view of the Christmas tree, the presents underneath it, the table, all set, the smell coming from the kitchen, and the soft Christmas carols in the back. He takes it all at once, and it shakes him real hard. It has been years since he last entered such a picture. His last Christmas with his family, with Daisy and Tess, with everything he had before, seems like centuries ago. The view squeezes his heart, and for a second, he forgets to breath.

Then he turns the head and sees on the couch Ellie smiling, next to Tom, probably sulking, and on the floor Fred. The latter is very focused on a drawing he's making on the coffee table. He frowns, pen in hand, and tilts his head in a very serious manner. Alec's lips stretch.

"Boys." Ellie warns. "Well, say hello."

Tom gives him a suspicious look. "Hi." he mumbles, and resumes sulking.

"'Ello" Alec tries to sound pleasant. Or tries to remember how to sound pleasant. He doesn't recall the last time he made efforts for social conventions.

"Fred." Ellie gently calls, and the wee lad raises his head from his drawing. "Uncle Alec is here."

The little boy's head turn and a smile of delight appears on his face when he sees the former cop. He lets go of his so important drawing and runs to grip Alec's leg, squeeling "Unk ahec!"

A fond chuckle shakes Hardy and he bents to lift the toddler. He gets a proper look at the boy when he's in his arms and can see he's grown of five inches at least since the last time he saw him. Fred starts to play with his beard and nostalgy runs through Alec as he feels those little hands clumsily caressing his face. He glances at Ellie, who is silent all of a sudden, and sees her watching the pair of them with wide eyes. A gost of a man is dancing on her iris, and she gulps when she realises how she misses this. Not him. This.  
Alec is powerless. He would like to mend that woman, make her forget this son of a bitch who destroyed her life, and find back the former, smily Ellie. But he knows he can't. So he does the only thing he still knows how to do. He pretends.

"Smells lovely. What've you cooked ?"

Ellie gets back on earth when the words register. "Oh, I made a small turquey, with rosted potatoes. Tom cooked the desert."

Alec lifts his eyebrows and turns to the teenager. "Did you ?"

"Yup." he mutters, and then gets up to go to the kitchen. When he is gone, Ellie looks at Alec with an apologetic expression.

"Sorry. He's all grumpy. As always mind you."

Alec shakes his head as he puts down Fred who started to wiggle in his arms. "'S alright. I've got my own monosyllabic teen at home." he explains.

"How's Daisy ?" She knows it hasn't always been easy.

"Fine." he says in an very evasive manner. "Can I help with anything ? Table, lights, cooking ... ?"

She lets him change the subject and makes a mental note of breaking the ice later. Since then, it's Christmas, and everyone is allowed to forget problems on Christmas.

"No it's fine. You're a guest for Christ's sake. Sit and eat and you'll find me delighted."

A smile stretches his lips, and he can't help but notice it is the third time in the evening it has happened to him. Ellie seems to be a good influence on him. And the dinner only confirms that first thought. It is somehow the weirdest Christmas dinner he's ever had. He is surrounded by a woman and two children, who are nothing of his family. Yet, he could sometimes be fooled by the image they give. When they all start laughing at an other trick of Fred, eating at the end of the table, and babbling some very coherent nonsense. Or when they make aaahs and oooohs as Tom brings his desert on a tray with a proud smile he has trouble to hide. Or even when they open crackers, and that one of them just goes off in Alec's face. But that was only because he was trying to open one of Tom's that was blocked he'll tell you.

Anyways, Alec doesn't see the evening pass. Even Tom, got tired of sulking, and put on a broad smile from the moment Alec told him he'd like to practice football again.

Several time in the evening though, Alec sees Ellie is gone in another world, as a mask of sadness and uncomprehension shadows her expression. She compensates with the wine, he notices. A glass after another, he just sees her slightly change and become more joyful, more smily. More Ellie.

He is almost surprised when finally theirs drinks and plates are empty, and the candles start to extinguish in the wax. Fred yawns terribly and Ellie goes to put him in bed while Tom and Alec are cleaning off. When Ellie comes back, the teenager announces he'll also go sleep, and she lets him go in his bedroom with no further question. His behavior through the evening was already quite a miracle.

Before leaving, he makes Alec promise to come to the house to practice every once in a while, and Alec finds himself agreeing, almost happily. He wonders for a brief moment if he hasn't drunk too much too, then blames himself for the thought. Tom is a good lad.

He thoughtfully watches him climb the stairs and disappear behind the wall. Her voice cuts him off his thoughts.

"Do you really know how to play football ?" Ellie is teasing.

"I'm an expert (his accent thicker on the word) in football." he claims.

She snorts and he makes and indignant face.

"Do you need a ride back to your place ?"

He's about to say he's fine when she cuts him off. "Where do you stay exactly ?"

"At the ... At the hotel." he answers a bit surprised. "Where did you think I stayed ?"

"Oh I don't know." she shakes her hand in the air while putting away the candles. "Thought you might have found you own place by now." She finishes tiding up and looks at him, hands on her hips. "You know, somewhere you could actually call home."

He makes a face, knowing all too well where the conversation is going and shoves his hands in his pockets. "I don't need a place like that, Miller. I'm fine with my hotels."

She frowns and he knows she'll start teaching him a lesson. "Nobody can be fine with 'just hotels'. You need somewhere to land Alec. If only for your own mental health."

"My mental health is absolutely fine thank you very much." he retorts feeling a bit vexed.

"What about your heart's ?" she suddenly lets out.

He looks at her a bit taken aback and then smirks. "It's been burning your tongue for the whole evening hasn't it ?" She blushes a bit. "My heart's fine Miller. I've got a bit of metal on it and it's making wonders. But you know that. You know I'm not the one who's not fine. Exept you don't want it to work like that."

Ellie looks down and her hand on the head of the chair tightens her grip.

"Do you ?" Alec says more softly.

She doesn't say anything, but really, what's to be said ? Alec takes a step closer and hesitates.

"I could help you, Miller." She won't meet his gaze. "If only you let me."

His voice his soft, and she can hardly recognize her former shouting boss. His words are those she's been expecting for so long, and she doesn't even know if they're real.

"You don't want to have to deal with my problems." she weakly protests, because she has to. But in fact, her heart is already in his hands.

"You're my friend aren't you ?" Alec gets closer, until he's standing right in front of her. "Your problems are my problems." He is smiling gently and Ellie can't help but laugh.

"Is that from a book or something ?"

He makes a face and she laughs more. And he can't help but grin because really, the sound is music to his ears. Smily Ellie.

But the laughters die as they always do and he is standing again in front of a broken and exhausted woman. How much time will it take before she heals ?  
Ellie looks up at him and he sees, looking down to her eyes, all the trust she gives him.

"Can I have a hug ?"

Alec could laugh at the irony of it all, or be embarassed by the boldness of the question that isn't quite like them. Instead, he just brings her close to him and feels her adjust in his chest, just like she has some hours ago. And again, he finds that they fit.

This time, he holds her much tighter, because he knows she won't go away. And he doesn't hesitate before burrying his nose in the crook of her neck, closing his eyes to enjoy the moment better.

But Alec has forgotten, because he forgets quickly, that contrary to their first hug, he now has alcohol in his organism. And maybe, just maybe, his behavior is slightly different. Bolder.

And he has also forgotten that Ellie has maybe had too many drinks, and that it is late, and also, that it is Christmas.

He only then realises how warm she is against his chest. Her breathing, synchronized with his. Her hands fisted in his shirt. And then there is his lips. His lips only millimeters away of the skin of her neck. And her smell so overwhelmingly Ellie.

He only grazes her skin at first. Ever so lightly. But then it's a kiss that he presses in her neck. Soft. But burning.

Ellie's hearbeat quickens and her respiration gets more shallow, as she can feel his hot breath on her skin. She closes her eyes and doesn't move. Because this feels far too good.

Alec's hands go from her shoulders to her waist and he presses another kiss to the tender flesh. He cannot stop. Time is frozen.

Ever so slightly, Ellie bents her head on one side and expose a bit more flesh to his mouth that hurries to trail more kisses along the jaw line, the cheeks. Each of them is so soft and affectionate she even wonders if they exist. But then she opens her eyes and sees him, his face, his eyes, his mouth, so close to hers, and she gets lost in his gaze, because it's dark.

There are no words. Because everything is understood. Because there are no questions to ask. This woman and this man need each other, so much, so blatantly. And they can feel that their hearts are the same.

Her hands run through his hair and his come to gently cup her face.

It's a gentle kiss. A short kiss. But followed by a longer and more languid one. One of his hand slides to the side of her head and the other comes at her waist to pull her flush against him. She wimpers and he feels like his heart is going to let go, even with the pacemaker calming it down.

Each other just feels heavenly. And again, even among his clouded thoughts comes one idea : they just fit. And that's beautiful.

When they part they don't even open their eyes and stay head against head, panting slightly. Her thumb strokes his cheek and his large hand draws patterns on her waist.

"Ellie." he just murmurs.

They stay like this for a moment which later will feel as if everything around had stopped.

Then she takes his hand, kisses him and pulls him in the direction of the stairs.

Again, not a word is exchanged. She leads him to her bedroom, closes the door, doesn't even bother turn the lights on, and pushes him down on the bed next to her.

She kisses him again and snuggles up to him with a content sigh. Alec smiles, because this is so like Ellie. He gets rid of his shoes and puts an arm around her shoulder, kissing the crown of her head.

Her arm circles his waist and he couldn't feel happier. Neither could she.

A part of Alec wants to marvel at what change has just occured in their relationship, but the other part claims that, it couldn't feel more logical. They just fit.

Before falling in a dreamless sleep, Alec swears he can see through the window flakes falling, white on the dark sky. But before he can process that thought, he is sound asleep, like he hasn't been for a long time.

Ellie sleeps too, happily cuddled to that man she probably does a bit more than like.

And a stranger looking at the house from the outside could rightfully be fooled. Because they do look like a family falling asleep on a Christmas eve, ready to open the presents the next morning, in a new changed life.

 

Because as I told you many times : Alec and Ellie just fit.

**Author's Note:**

> Fluff is life. Hope you liked it :)


End file.
